Saturday was Premier League day

When I was younger, two or three years ago, Saturday was Premier League/football day. Everything was about the 3 O'Clock kick off and the 5pm results. I didn't even attend matches. From the comforts of my home, with my ear pressed to the radio, my footy obsession was exercised liberally. Never mind family, friends, life and existence - 5Live/Talksport was be all/end all.



I used to care so much for the fortunes of my beloved team. Nerves would jangle like billi-o. My intestines would be like a rubber-band ball. And, due to the nature of the team I support, invariably, the result would be disappointing and all that pent-up energy would come gushing out in a fire-brand of keyboard tapping.



Yup, I was (and kinda still am) a notorious Football Fan Forum/Messageboard Fiend. When my team (let's call them Hala Stream) suffered inglorious defeat, I would hit that messageboard like a typhoon, plundering out intense arguments to support my criticisms of the manager and the players. I'd whip into online scuffles with my fellow posters - and I had the advantage of never tiring of continuing the argument. Yup, I was one of those. Please forgive me.



But what was it all for. I think I developed the skill of constucting sound and convincing arguments. I reckon that I have got quite good at analysing and understanding football. But has forming an in-depth understanding of the psyche of Alan Green (crazy footy radio commentator) or learning to mimic Gerard Houllier (a rather rubbish French football manager) or generally becoming uber knowledgeable about football been really that useful?



Frankly, not really. It was all the excitable and gullible delusion of a youngster (which, in my defence, I was). I feel sorry for people who never reach some level of footy fatigue enlightenment, no matter how much inner turmoil it thrusts upon you. Without, footy enlightenment, you go through your life thinking that a game is life and that a roster of stupid millionaires (or rich men) is worthy of your worship and domination of your time, energy, emotions and happiness. Which is not that far off being wildly concerned and deeply moved by something like who is at No.1 of the Song Charts or the biggest movers and fallers of the FTSE 100.



I guess if your life is very depressing, it is attractive to suffer from a delusion, like being obsessed with a football team. It means that, now and again, you are happy - and that you have an interest. But, frankly, a delusion only papers over the chasmic cracks and the chickens will come home to roost, eventually.



However, let's be clear, football isn't the worst obsession you could have. Life generally is very unsatsifying and often boasts the same or similar foibles of sport. Yet, I think, in the end, true happiness (which I and most people are after) will only come from becoming truly aware of what does matter and what doesn't really. That's not to say you can't care about pointless stuff - but you need to remain emotionally aloof. I reckon.



So, in a way, when I'm blogging about football or sport, they can be treated as symbols for all the pointless stuff we do to escape from the reality of our lives. It's not just football or TV or chewing our finger nails that we need to put into perspective but EVERYTHING. Once we've done that, then are we taking the first steps to true happiness.



Thanks for reading this. It is only my second post, so please don't judge me too harshly...



PS Hala Stream are playing today. They haven't been faring to well this season and do really need the points to steer to safety.